Reading HopeLabs and Born This Way Foundation’s report, Exploring Pride and Support of LGBTQ+ Young People in Rural Communities, reminded me of my own journey, and I felt the need to share.

I was more than aware, through personal experience, how uncomfortable it is living in a rural and unsupportive town in relation to my sexual identity. It was quiet, but within the silence, there was an awareness to never speak on the matter. The hate-filled flags people in town raised said more than enough to solidify to me that it would be a bad decision.

So I remained hidden away in my room that soon became my bushel, away from my community, as I came to the conclusion that I would not be accepted if I came out for risk of being ostracized or potentially attacked. I felt as though I was not myself. As though I was lying about who I was. But to me, this was a better decision, as it was the safest decision. This self-isolation ensured my physical protection, but at the cost of my mental health.

The isolation I felt compounded my sense of loneliness, knowing that I could never realistically find a community in person to relate to. However, online is where I found a light, a place of community that I did not have in-person. This inspired me to become comfortable in my identity.

Seeing communities online fostering identity acceptance was amazing to experience, as I had never seen that in person! In my town, it was common to see people holding flags displaying hateful messages, posting banners of political candidates with hurtful slogans, even protesters with their posterboards sharing their harmful beliefs. But on places such as TikTok and Instagram, there were entire pages dedicated to nurturing comfort in one’s identity. This light brought me comfort in a way I could not have in-person in my own town. No longer was I squirming my own discomfort, rather, I became enthralled in these digital communities fostering love and support.

I share that online spaces can be a safe haven to those in many rural towns that may feel unsafe to disclose their identity within their community, especially in this political climate. There are still many who do not have the privilege or support to come out publicly, but these communities online can foster self-acceptance and community support. I began to flourish under my bushel and have grown a new acceptance of myself through the support of these online spaces.

I believe that the BTWF and Hopelab report perfectly encapsulate my experience, and I am happy that other rural youth have found their safe havens online. For me, I am happy to flourish online under my bushel until I am in a safe and comfortable area.